Monday=Melancholy

For me it does, anyway. Very uneventful weekend. I spent most of it at home watching TV or napping.

Don't know why I'm in this funk. Could be Jimmy's surgery coming up. Most likely is, with the accompanying stress about it, including, but not limited to, stress about his health, stress over sick leave (don't have enough- you try to stretch one person's sick leave over six people {me, Jimmy, our three kids and Mother}- it's hard to do!), stress over finances, stress because I'm tired, stress because I want to stay here at home with him after the surgery and stress because I can't (refer to the sick leave statement). I keep thinking that someday, just someday, there'll be a reprieve from a stressful life. Don't guess that it's going to happen. Therefore, I'm in a funk. Melancholy. Whatever you want to call it.

A pretty good Thursday

I was born on a Thursday. Rachel was born on a Thursday and so was Layke. Thursday is just about my favorite day of the week.

Today started with a vanilla latte made with Jimmy's new baby, a Delonghi espresso machine. OMG, it is wonderful! I slap some ground decaf in there (he keeps his high octane beans in the machine, so I use ground espresso) press a button and PRESTO! I have a little shot of awesome espresso. I pour it into a tall glass with milk, sugar-free vanilla syrup and lots of ice. Ahhhhh. What did I do without one of these machines all these years? I know what I did. I went to Jamoka's once a week with Jimmy and Seth and plopped down 15 bucks for our drinks! Now I don't have to wait until Saturday mornings! Plus I save money. Yay!

Back to Thursday...I had a department head meeting at nine. I like to hear what everyone else in the city is doing. I'm especially interested in the recycling efforts that have begun. They are only open a day and a half a week, but this morning it was reported that nearly 500 people are participating. That's a great start. I've turned into a recycling fool! I'm no tree hugger, but if things can be used again, why bury them in a landfill where they may never go away? I pillage through the garbage at home and at work and fuss if I find a coke bottle or styrofoam! My family and my staff think I'm a wee bit nutty, but that's ok! I'll happily wash out the styrofoam containers that hold our breakfasts each Friday!

After the meeting I came back to the library and began working on some financial things that I'm going to need for my end of the year report. It has to be done at the end of September and it'll be here before I can turn around! I'll be very happy that I started doing this.

Lunch at home today was typical. Mr. Spunky Bogart had strowed seeds all over the floor. They haven't been vacuumed yet. That can wait until after 5! Jimmy went to bed after we decided that tonight we're having Cracker Barrel for supper. Simple, fast, and easy. No grease in the kitchen, no dirty dishes. Sounds perfect to me!

The afternoon has been quiet. A woman that really grates on me came in. Kind of threw my Thursday under the bus, but thankfully she didn't say anything to me. She is one of these rich women who think they are just a little bit better than everyone else. I avoid her like the plague. Jimmy and I saw her in the grocery store one day and he asked me who she was and then he said, "She looks like a bitch." Oh, how perceptive that man can be! lol

Hope everyone has enjoyed their Thursday as much as I have. Tomorrow...FRIDAY!!

Got my boy home

Jimmy is now at home. Well, actually, he's at work. :( The doctor told him to stay out of work this week to recover and do you think he did? Nope. He's the most stubborn man I've ever seen. He's doing all right, eating pretty well, but he's very weak. He's taking 2000mg of antibiotics a day. That would make anybody feel like crap. I'm hoping he'll come home early today.

We go to the surgeon on July 29 to set up the surgery. I think he's scared; I know I would be! What indicated this to me is that last night he asked me if I was going to the doctor visit with him. This, from a man who never wants me to go. So I'm going.

I have a plane ticket and two concert tickets for shows August 12-15. This probably isn't going to happen. I have very mixed feelings about it even if his surgery is scheduled after these shows. I need to spend as much time as possible with him doing things and having fun because after the surgery it's going to be rough. I'm afraid he'll get a blood clot again after this surgery like he did the last one. There's just a lot to think about, and this is more important than seeing a couple of shows. I just hope when I make up my mind definitively that I can sell the concert tickets. They were expensive. The plane fare will be all right; it's with Southwest and I think you can bank your money with them for a future trip. If not, oh well.

Nothing much else to say today. I'm about caught up at work since I came in two hours early yesterday. I still have a few things, but nothing really pressing.

Another day

Jimbo's still in the hospital with a perforated colon which will require surgery in about four weeks. He has to heal first. He's had nothing but jello, broth and popsicles since Wednesday. Tonight he did get some vanilla ice cream.

Scary stuff, people. The surgeon said that the surgery will be major and I dread it so bad for him. Yeah, the English minor in me says that it should read "I dread it so badly" but I didn't want to write that.

Home isn't home with him here. Even though most of the time he's playing his bass with his headphones on and I'm clacking away at the computer, we are together. We may be in the bed with him doing a crossword puzzle and I may be reading, but we are together. And when I go to sleep at night I can reach out and touch his arm or hold his hand. I miss him being here.

I guess my anger has passed that was so very evident yesterday. I'm petrified, and anger is just part of it I guess. It's a hurdle I have to jump over and apparently I did it in record time this go around.

Looking toward tomorrow with hope that he'll get some cream soup or mashed potatoes to help build his strength.

Plans sure can change. Instead of getting ready to go out tonight to see Jimmy Wayne I am instead sitting in the Huntsville Hospital with my husband, who is sick as a dog. This is like bad deja vous. We have done this so many times in our marriage. I used to keep count of how many times one of our immediate family (Jimmy, me or one of the kids) has been in the hospital, but I gave up.

We've had our share, that's for sure. I don't mean to bitch about it, but it gets freaking old. I know people who have been married as long as us and nobody has ever been sick, much less in the hospital.

Here are just a few admissions:

Mystery pain about 4 times
Ruptured appendix (the reason for the mystery pain)
endometrial ablation
hysterectomy
infant sleep apnea (twice)
knee surgery
gall bladder surgery
kidney removal
blood clot

Oh, and I could go on. And on. And this isn't counting stuff like ER visits, nephritis, outpatient surgeries, etc.

I'm just depressed. I keep waiting for the time when nothing is going to be wrong. We've always joked about the "Rowell curse" we have, but it's not too freaking funny anymore.

I really, really need to vent today. People who think I'm crazy for traveling and who say things like, "I don't see how Jimmy puts up with it" can kiss my ass. They have no clue what is going on in my family or the relationship my husband and I have. What is so wrong about trying to squeeze a little pleasure out of life in between the crises? He has his music, I have my traveling. It makes us happy to do these things and takes our minds off the stresses of day to day life. And it's none of anybody's damn business.

Now. I would say I feel better, but I don't. I'll get past it. When my Jimmy is better. I'm really worried about him.

Being Lazy on a Sunday Afternoon

Yes, that would be me. Miss Lazy. In my defense, I AM washing clothes and I DID cook lunch and I DID go to the store this morning. But right now, I'm in my room, light off, a Hershey Bliss in my mouth, squinty-eyed from sleepiness.

The past few nights I have gotten to where I lay down with the light off, play Scrabble on my phone and listen to my ipod. I got in the bed last night at 9:30 and before I knew it, it was three hours later! Jeffrey Steele is who I listen to the most, but Jim Croce, James Taylor, Darius Rucker (When he was Hootie) and a few others join him.

Traveling to work every day only takes three minutes. I can't even listen to one entire song! So there's really not a lot of time to enjoy my music. At work I try to turn it on sometimes but I always get interrupted so I don't even try most of the time.

Music has always been a huge part of my life. I remember when I was four and had the mumps my mother bought a 45 record of the Beatles I want to hold your hand with the flip side I saw her standing there. I laid there in the bed at my grandmother's house listening and trying to smile even though my neck was a big as a watermelon!

I collected hundreds of 45s and had some really, really good ones. When I was in third grade I was coming home from a friend's house and I dropped and broke most of them. Oh, I was sick!

By middle school I was listening to Carole King, Carly Simon, Allman Brothers, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Led Zeppelin and all of the Top 40 songs. Steve Miller Band's The Joker was one of my favorites. I went to Birmingham to see the Shower of Stars, sponsored every year by WVOK. The Grass Roots were there the year I went. I can't remember anyone else right off the top of my head. Maybe I can look it up somewhere online. And like most girls at the time I loved Donny Osmond and the Osmond Brothers and also David Cassidy, and Bobby Sherman. The walls of my bedroom were covered!

I went to see the Osmonds several times, as well as Chicago, The Carpenters, and the biggie...Three Dog Night!! Oh my, how I loved them! I had every album they ever put out. I was fifteen and saw them in Huntsville at Milton Frank Stadium.

When I started dating Jimmy, we went to see several concerts. We loved Willie Nelson and saw him a few times, as well as The Oak Ridge Boys. Over the years since then I have seen quite an eclectic collection of people. Wynonna, Clint Black, The Guess Who, Martina McBride, Billy Dean, Atlanta Rhythm Section, James Taylor, Vince Gill, Alabama, Kenny Rogers, Fleetwood Mac just to name a few. I didn't see many concerts during the years I was raising my children. But after they got older, I started following Bo Bice, and he has introduced me to some fantastic musicians!

I've become a fan of Gary Nichols, Kris Bell, LoCash Cowboys, Eliot Morris and countless other artists because of his introduction, influence or me being in a certain place because of him. Just because I went to the CMA Festival this year, I found somebody that I just love! Jeffrey Steele is amazing. Outstanding. Talented. Entertaining. I'm smitten. He's awesome!

Next Friday night I plan on going down to Bessemer to see Jimmy Wayne. Bo's former bassist now plays with him, and I love Luis and want to go see him. I'm even dragging Jimmy with me. I think he'll enjoy it and I hope he can meet Luis. Luis has answered many bass questions Jimmy had through me the past couple of years!

Someone Jimmy and I have been fans of for over twenty years is the fantastically talented Mr. John Cowan. We first learned of John when he was in the band Newgrass Revival. We finally made it to a couple of concerts and he is just as nice as can be and his voice is unbelievable. Check him out if you've never heard of him. That voice, man, that voice...is so powerful!

I really need to scan some of my old pictures that I took at concerts back in the day. I'll try and do that soon!

In the meanwhile, check out this website dedicated to the old WVOK. There are several pages of pictures from the Shower of Stars. I was there for the year they had The Grass Roots (as I said earlier) and now I remember seeing Climax, too. Pretty cool site! I think I was at the show in August of 1970 where Iron Butterfly played. Gosh, looks like I could remember!! I know for sure I was there in 1970. It was in 6th grade and I was 11. After looking at the advertisements I'm changing my mind. I may have been at the one with Paul Revere and the Raiders. There are pictures of Climax but it doesn't have them listed on any of the advertisements. I remember that vividly because my friend Susan's mom's eyes like to have popped out of her head when I told her I saw Climax! LOL LOL!!

http://wvok-memories.tripod.com/

Wednesday evening in the 'ville

I'm at home alone with Jimmy and it's quiet, very quiet. All I can hear are the sounds of the dryer and the bell ringing in the parrot's cage. This is heaven to me. No TV, no music, no talking, just quiet.

Times like these are rare. Growing up I was used to the quiet. I was an only child living with my mother and various pets. I enjoyed my solitude and I was very rarely lonely.

After I married and had three children, it seemed that life was always at full throttle. From Sesame Street to Backstreet Boys to Ninja Turtles to Nascar, there was always something going on. Kids were in and out of the house constantly, slamming doors, playing guitars, giggling, and fussing. There were times when I wanted to scream or just run away!

Nowdays I still have two grown boys at home. It's still not quiet here. There is always an episode of Scrubs playing on the DVD player or music going or phones ringing or computers clacking. Seth does wear earphones all the time to listen to his music. I'm concerned that he's going to be deaf, but he just pooh-poohs me and keeps on wearing them and listening LOUD!

Nobody is home except Jimmy and me tonight and he's in the other room looking up blues songs on the internet. My eyes are closed as I type this and I can feel my breathing, all steady and slow. What bliss this is!

Sad news today though. The wife of a doctor who used to live here died this morning from injuries she sustained from a lightning strike Monday. How weird is that? She was taking out the trash. I remember them well. They visited our home on numerous occasions. She taught me how to make homemade sloppy joes and I fed them chili. At their home was no television-they were Mennonites- but the Mr. always rented one to watch certain football games! Their kids were little aliens, they had to be! I've never seen a 4 year old keep everything in his room spotless and every toy piece and game together organized on a shelf! Man, did my kids wreak havoc over there!

I can't remember the last time I saw her. It's funny how you say you're going to keep in touch when someone moves, then time ticks by and you never do. I'm sorry I didn't keep our friendship going throughout the years. Rest in peace, Dawn; may God comfort Jon and the kids as they cope with your passing.

Holiday Weekend

It's almost over, unfortunately! Friday was a nice day. We got up, had breakfast and cleaned up things a bit. Then we grilled some burgers and hotdogs and played Rook all afternoon and evening on the patio. We made some delicious margaritas. I have finally found a mixer I like! That might not be a good thing...!

Yesterday we went to Jimmy's aunt & uncle's house and I stayed in the pool. Jimmy, Layke and Seth were poops because they didn't swim. That water sure did feel good! It wasn't really that hot here, which is surprising. The 4th of July is usually so hot that it's miserable. We stayed until the middle of the afternoon, then came home, napped, and then last night we had the ribs and such that Jimmy had smoked. He's really good with that smoker!

Today it is raining. It hasn't rained here in a while. I have started cleaning in my room. Where does all the dirt and dust come from?? And the stuff. I have more stuff! I've thrown away quite a bit and I'm not halfway finished. I want to clean out the bookcase, which will be a major undertaking. I took down my curtains because I hate them. To me it's better to not have anything but blinds up instead of curtains I hate! I'm going to look for a new bedroom suite. Not sure I can afford one right now, but I'm going to look.

This blog is about as interesting as wet cardboard. Nothing to say much and I'm in a blah mood. I'll do better the next time.

July 2, 1977

This morning I was driving down the road and it hit me that today was July 2. I got engaged on July 2! And it was THIRTY-TWO years ago! Holy cow!

I don't remember a whole lot about the day. Jimmy was rushing around, getting ready for a jazz band performance in our town's main mall. He came into my bedroom, dropped a ring box in my lap and flew into the bathroom and started fixing his hair. (Oh, how vain he was about that beautiful blonde hair!) I remember sitting there with my heart pounding and I opened the box. There was a beautiful solitaire ring in there, white gold, and I was just shaking! I can't remember what he said, but he poked his head out of the bathroom and I said, "Well, at least come and put it on me!" He did, and we left to go to our town's 4th of July celebration.

Details of that day are blurry, but I remember showing that ring off to everybody! It's not like we hadn't talked about marriage, but this made it official! If it doesn't sound real romantic, keep in mind that Jimmy was 17 years old! LOL! No romantic dinner with candles and wine for us!

Another thing I remember is going to Guntersville to the lake where his family was having a picnic. It was either the next day or actually on the 4th. I remember his Paw Paw Eason being there and me showing him my ring. And I remember that Paw Paw asked me if I had heard that song, "Margaritaville"!

So, that's how Jimmy and I got engaged. Awesome, huh? ;)